Tuesday, June 9, 2015

And then there's this.....

We set big goals not to achieve them, but to set ourselves on a road trip toward them. 
That's where the good living is. 
- Lauren Fleshman

Though the face may be healed...the brain certainly is not.  As much as I would have liked to speed this healing up...and I thought I could convince myself that it was better...the headaches comes...and the dizziness.....

So..much to my deepest sadness, but not regret, I cannot race this weekend.  When I let myself dwell on it too long, I begin to hyperventilate about "all the miles I am missing."...How am I going to just hop on the bike and do 90 miles in 10 days?  how will I know if I'm ready?  What will I do if I'm not ready?  

But what's bugging me the most right now..is work....and since this may or may not be a public posting..I can't say anything more than that. Its just that I don't like others having to pick up my slack..its nothing work has done or said..its my own inability to let others do what I inevitably would do for them!!!  

This accident actually forced me to ask for help..from people other than my family....it made me think...it makes me nervous sometimes for the future....and sometimes..being is a nurse is its own worst enemy =)

I cried for the first time since the accident this morning....I hate crying..it makes my eyes red and my nose stuffy and my head hurt worse!  On the other hand...everyone deserves a good cry now and then.

And so I must remember the saying above...the good living IS in the journey...wherever the journey takes us (as long as I don't get fat sitting on the couch in the process!)


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