WOW...I am amazed...

So, today's results made me smile.  I admit it, I was nervous...about what, I'm not even sure...what the "numbers" said...and I wasn't even sure what the "numbers" should BE, or should SHOW....but here it is.....

The visual is sobering...

Since June, I have lost just about 16lbs (42 total lbs), almost 9% body fat and gained 3.5lbs of lean muscle mass.

Who knew it was so hard to gain muscle mass???  Everyone would like you to think, that when your weight stalls on a weight loss program, its because you have "gained muscle."..Seriously, 3.5lbs of muscle gain took 7 months of 3 x week kettle bell/strength classes.  Whew!!

I am over the moon with the way this is going.  Not because it was/is easy, but because its simple and something I can do for the rest of my life.  I'm not, in general, hungry.  I do not feel deprived.  When I want something, I CHOOSE to eat it (though this is few and far between, b/c I just don't WANT it anymore). Pictures like this one not only validate the work, but lends itself to great incentive to never go back!  The foods I am eating now are good foods and good FOR me foods. 

So, even though i'm stuck at 140lbs...I don't consider it stuck anymore...If more weight comes off during IM training, so be it, but i'm still all about increasing muscle mass and strength, especially in my legs. (I gained almost all of my lean muscle in my trunk).  You can even see that my spine fat decreased, the shoulders and my waist...amazing...even my big fat head got smaller!! )...

So, future goals....

1. Unassisted pull up- by the end of march 2015 (what if that doesn't happen..ok..whenever it happens)

2. muscle up (just one..in the next year).

3. Drop my Half marathon time to between 2:15 and 2:30

4. Drop my HIM by 1 hr (or just finally finish under the cut off!)

5. Drop my IM time by 2 hours.

6. At this moment, there are no weight lifting goals b/c strict strength will start in April and I will have a better judgement of what I want and where I need to go.  Then I will update this list.

STRONG NOT SKINNY......7 month DXA check in tomorrow...sigh....

Tomorrow 2/4/15 I am going to have this test redone.  The DXA scan is one of the most accurate ways of measuring body fat outside of the test done in water.  The first time I had this done, I was shocked with my body fat percentage.  I knew I was overweight..obese even, but I had no idea.  One reason was because all the "caliper" tests and the "tests based on biometrics and hydration status" were all about 10-14% less than what this test showed.  My visceral fat load was 1.6lbs. (fat around my internal organs).

Tomorrow...I am expecting it to be better....then WHY the hell am I so nervous about it?  I have no idea what a good body fat percentage loss is...I guess i'm afraid that it won't be "enough"...I already know that my BMI still has me in the overweigh category even though i'm in a size 6-8.  I'm stronger, for sure...but how much stronger.  My stomach fat/skin bothers me a lot...more than it probably should. AND..i want to be at my original goal weight..which is 128lb.  I think I need to go back and start over....i feel like i eat too much....ugh..this is so scary...how am i going to maintain with the next Tri season looming ahead.

I think I don't want to be disappointed that my hard work, or what I believe to be hard work, has not paid off in big dividends.  

Truth...I'm still living in a fat girl's brain.  I cannot seem to help it...